are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
My bed smells like the plague
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