just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize