Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize