that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
