She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Randomize
