belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
