they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
