so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize