Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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