I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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