David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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