Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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