My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize