Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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