Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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