i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize