You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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