I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I need help removing her.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
