They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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