I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
