4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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