Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
