Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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