google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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