1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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