guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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