btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'll put lettuce on them
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.