I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just google imaged poop.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
