Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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