Duck Duck Cougar?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that