Texts From Last Night

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  (561): View more from Florida

  As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother

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  (561): As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother http://tfl.nu/1acl
  Replies (21) Good night (2342) Bad night (665)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick

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  (703): Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick http://tfl.nu/1qrd
  Replies (32) Good night (3089) Bad night (1012)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'

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  (973): my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!' http://tfl.nu/vh00
  Replies (27) Good night (1080) Bad night (3342)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"

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  (301): My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock" http://tfl.nu/tlon
  Replies (53) Good night (9913) Bad night (1035)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  My balls are so social today.

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  (540): My balls are so social today. http://tfl.nu/wyah
  Replies (8) Good night (4221) Bad night (748)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him

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  (321): even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him http://tfl.nu/7qwv
  Replies (19) Good night (1284) Bad night (4298)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  sarcasm needs its own font

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  (440): sarcasm needs its own font http://tfl.nu/5kc7
  Replies (55) Good night (8569) Bad night (1010)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out

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  (423): Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out http://tfl.nu/rbnc
  Replies (13) Good night (1534) Bad night (3353)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?

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  (818): What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction? http://tfl.nu/asxf
  Replies (17) Good night (947) Bad night (5146)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.

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  (603): Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/rqjn
  Replies (8) Good night (2379) Bad night (1379)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.

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  (530): he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning. http://tfl.nu/2vwb
  Replies (11) Good night (2554) Bad night (1042)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint

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  (415): dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint http://tfl.nu/6bee
  Replies (5) Good night (1284) Bad night (2480)
• Favorite

  (660): View more from Missouri

  It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.

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  (660): It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope. http://tfl.nu/g3x7
  Replies (7) Good night (1270) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing

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  (775): I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing http://tfl.nu/nqjl
  Replies (6) Good night (1124) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it

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  (607): I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it http://tfl.nu/h8wz
  Replies (2) Good night (633) Bad night (365)

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