3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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