it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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