Dual....:-)
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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