dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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