Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
it wasn't lemon gatorade
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Randomize