i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
