Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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