u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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