You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
