your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Terrible idea I love it
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
