you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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