im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
