yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
