I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
