I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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