Pappa wants mamma naked
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
