Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Randomize
