do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I need moral support for this bender
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Randomize
