that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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