Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
